Trust That He Does Not Make Trash
Are we doing this to ourselves?
Sometimes our worst enemy isn’t the world, but the patterns we quietly weave into ourselves.
I often wonder if we subconsciously create the very patterns that keep us intrinsically unhappy. Not just pattern recognition, but something deeper – a silent, deliberate self-sabotage.
For example, I have long believed that sorrow and pain are an artist’s best friends. That suffering is a catalyst. But if that thought is always humming in the background, does it shape me? Do I behave in ways to ensure sorrow will remain? Do I invest just enough, only to pull back when joy could have been galvanized into strength?
These questions grow larger the more I ask them. Was I wrong all along about emotions and values? Or was I simply a utensil forged in a different kind of fire – one of sorrow, one of reclaimed suffering? Now that I have slapped a label on the possibility of unconscious sabotage, I cannot help but check myself. Often I step back, only to find that I was the problem – or at least, my view of myself was.
Lately I think I am just plain wrong. Wrong in my mind. Wrong in the way I look at the world. Wrong in my writing. Wrong in the million little things I have failed to do, and the million more I have done poorly.
When these moments come – and they are not rare – I remind myself: it is precisely here that faith is stretched. Like any muscle, it must be exercised, strained, and tested to grow.
And so I reach a quiet conclusion: it is okay to be wrong about everything, so long as you are right about the one thing that matters. Yeshua. Our Heavenly Father. If His bedrock is beneath us, if His Spirit presides, then there is time – time to learn, to age, to grow. Time to begin seeing Him in us, and to realize that this is redemption. Time to trust how He sees us, even when all we see in the mirror is trash.
Leave self-definition to God.
Be kind to yourself.
Show mercy to you, so you can show mercy to them as you always wanted.
Trust that He does not make trash.
As always, Dust,
To you,
For you,
From Him,
In
If this piece spoke to something inside you, would you consider sharing it? Perhaps someone else is caught in their own patterns and needs to hear that God does not make trash.